By Two Legs Good

There are times you know you've missed out on something special. Going back to the shop where we spotted this only to find it had already been sold was definitely one of them. After all, no home could surely be complete without:

What do you mean, "What is it?" - well, isn't that perfectly obvious?

It's a clock. A pendulum clock, at that. All mounted on a huge imitation marble plinth. A giant plinth. A prince of plinths.

With, of course, a built-in faux Louis XIV style telephone. Well, you would, wouldn't you?

And you couldn't have that without a separate ornamental puch-button fake-dialler keypad now, could you. Ha, they've thought of that already, and supplied one covered, like the phone, in brassy plastic.

And in case you get bored just watching the pendulum while you yap away on the phone, there's entertainment! A torpedo-shaped water-tank with swirling tornado effect, and a couple of plastic fish to spin around in it!

Oh, and we musn't forget the shiny chrome Art Deco lamp-dome on the top. That's it just under the lightning-conductor.

Yes, the lightning-conductor.

No, really. Look:

If we see one again, we're having it. It's obviously the best example of it's kind... unless, as dear old Esther, may she rest in peace, used to say, unless you know better...

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