JINGS! CRIVVENS! SCOTS LIB DEMS NAME NEW LEADER

By Two Legs Good

After the disastrous results at the recent elections and the resignation of their leader, Tavish Scott, the Scottish Liberal Democrats have a new leader. The UK is, obviously, reeling at this momentous change.

It's heartening to see they've picked such a popular and recognisable Scot this time:



We say 'pick', but of course there was no real choice - he was only person that had submitted his name! Obviously the very thought of running against Wullie Rennie had terrified the other possible candidates. After all, who'd want to go up against a runner-up of the Scottish Coal-Carrying Championships? That's some heavyweight political ju-ju right there!

Oor Wullie might not even be allowed the automatic right to ask questions at First Meenister's Questions - they may have to take it in turns with Patrick Harvie, representing the Greens, and Big Hen, representing the Broons.

It's also being reported that the Scots Lib Dems have so few seats they've been relegated to sitting outside the back door of the parliament on upturned buckets.

Oor Wullie? More like Poor Wullie!




vote for or bookmark this article:


Bookmark this post:
Google Ma.gnolia DiggIt! Del.icio.us Blinklist Yahoo Furl Technorati Simpy Spurl Reddit StumbleUpon
Vote for this post: Top Blogs Vote on millionrss.com

A NICE BIT OF STONE-CLADDING ©™ - Part 9

By Two Legs Good

Yes, it's another Sunny Soaraway Stone-Cladding Sunday!


We've come to the conclusion that they can't help it.

People are strange, and no matter how they try to hide their strangeness from the rest of us, out it will pop like an electric weasel from their top pocket waving a big flag that says "WEIRD!".

Take, for example, Donald Trump's comb-over.

Now, YOU know he's baldy, WE know he's baldy, and let's face it, HE knows he's baldy. So why does he persist with such a preposterous comb-over?

Trump with anonymous brown nose.

There's hair going in all directions there, and none of them normal, like the sideburns being swept back around his ear to cover his neck. It's not just a comb-over in one direction, either - this is truly leading-edge comb-overy, with hair from the left swept across the head allied with hair from the back combed forward over it to form a bizarre weave at the front. It's only a matter of time before he starts cultivating his eyebrows and then his nose and ear hairs into the weave.

The saddest part of it is that he's fooling nobody, not even himself.

So what, we hear you ask, does this have to do with stone-cladding? After all, it's not like stone-cladders go out of their way to hide it; usually it sticks out like some gigantic pus-filled thumb.

Well, today's example is a bit more subtle. Restrained. Discrete, almost.


But, as we said at the start, people are strange, and people who stone-clad are stranger than most. They can't help it. And, as we said, no matter how they try to hide it - in this case with a pretty decent coat of paint - out it pops.

Now you might have thought that what alerted us to such camoflaged cladding was the fact that despite the rest of the street having darkish brown brick, here was a house that draws attention to itself with a bright creamy paint job. And yes, as we approached that certainly did catch the eye.

But what really made us look twice, what really gave the game away, was the shower-door.

Most people fit their shower-doors next to the shower itself. Not this lot, though - no, they can't resist giving that little signal that spells "WEIRD!" to the rest of us, that tip-off that they're not at home to Mr Normal, in the form of fitting their shower-door externally, nowhere near their shower.

An external shower-door that leads to an alley-way between houses. Obvious when you think of it, isn't it?

Despite their trying to make it blend in, it all draws the eye inevitably to what we now think of as the architectural equivalent of a comb-over, the stone-cladding.

And as with Trump, they're fooling nobody.



vote for or bookmark this article:


Bookmark this post:
Google Ma.gnolia DiggIt! Del.icio.us Blinklist Yahoo Furl Technorati Simpy Spurl Reddit StumbleUpon
Vote for this post: Top Blogs Vote on millionrss.com

HAGUE IN FAVOUR OF AV?

By Two Legs Good

Well, well, well!

Tuning in to the BBC News this evening we were surprised - we could almost use the word 'mugged' - by William Hague making a speech at the Lord Mayor's Easter Banquet. Now there's a man that likes the sound of his own very strange little voice, sounding all the world like a sleepy David Frost doing a bad imitation of Ringo Zzzzztarr narrating Thomazzzzz the Tank Engine.

We hit the 'mute' button immediately. We've been caught like that before.

We did grab these screen shots for you. The second one proves our point above - he'zzz been zo droney and boring he'zzzzz zzzzent himzzzzelf to zzzzzzleep mid zzzzzentenzzzze.

WAKE UP!

You have to be careful. We nearly went ourselves there.


Anyway, what of his message? Well, luckily the BBC have summarised it for us:

GOVERNMENTS AGAINST REFORM ARE DOOMED TO FAILURE



NO GOVERNMENT CAN RESIST DEMANDS FOR DEMOCRATIC CHANGE


So there we have it. Even in his doziest moments, William Hague believes in democratic change, and that standing against reform means a government is doomed to failure.

We can only hope he gets the message across to as many people as possible, especially his own colleagues in the Conservative Party, and they vote for reform, they vote for democratic change, they vote for AV.

Afore ye go...
Don't be vague, ask for AV!



vote for or bookmark this article:


Bookmark this post:
Google Ma.gnolia DiggIt! Del.icio.us Blinklist Yahoo Furl Technorati Simpy Spurl Reddit StumbleUpon
Vote for this post: Top Blogs Vote on millionrss.com

THE PRICE OF DEMOCRACY

By Two Legs Good

There's something puzzling us about this AV vote this week that we don't think has been explored properly yet. The 'No' side are saying 'Oooh, we shouldn't use AV, it'll be more expensive to count the votes'.

Since when should how expensive democracy is be an issue? When our forefathers fought for democracy, the rallying cry was 'Democracy at any price!' not 'Democracy at a reasonable price depending on market variables, the state of the economy and how much the bankers have pissed up a wall recently'.


The No-camp argument appears to be:

MORE DEMOCRACY = MORE COST

From that, it would seem reasonable to assume that:

LESS DEMOCRACY = LESS COST

In a time of austerity, when we're being asked to make sacrifices for the good of the economy, surely there's some fat to trim here? After all, if our democracy actually now does have a monetary cost, we could trim democracy and save some money.


How does a 50% saving in voting costs sound to you? Good? Helpful? Great! So let's do away with the votes for women!

Ker-ching!

Now calm down, dears! Remember ladies - we're all in this together!


Not enough? Fine. Nearly 30 million people voted in the last election - but what if only millionaires were entitled to vote? That would reduce it to around 300,000 voters. Getting rid of 99% of the voters - mainly the likes of you and us - could save 99% of the costs!

KER-CHING!

Remember plebs - we're all in this together!


Still not enough? What if we could save 99.999996% of the costs, by moving to a political system that's used in many, many countries around the world? Yes, the ever-present One-Man-One-Vote system, otherwise known as a Dictatorship. By allowing Dictator Dave to have the only vote we could eliminate almost all voting costs for ever. It worked for Adolf Hitler, it worked for Gaddafi, and it still works for Kim Jong-Il - why shouldn't it work for us?

KER-CHING!
KER-CHING!
KER-CHING!


Obviously we're using some pretty absurd and idiotic logic here to illustrate the point that the cost of voting is being thought of as more important than democracy - but that's the very same absurd and idiotic logic that the No-camp are currently using to argue against AV.


Don't let the absurd and idiotic win. Vote for AV.




vote for or bookmark this article:


Bookmark this post:
Google Ma.gnolia DiggIt! Del.icio.us Blinklist Yahoo Furl Technorati Simpy Spurl Reddit StumbleUpon
Vote for this post: Top Blogs Vote on millionrss.com

A NICE BIT OF STONE-CLADDING ©™ - Part 8

By Two Legs Good

Yes, it's another Sunny Soaraway Stone-Cladding Sunday!


Sorry for starting with what seems like a repeat, but please be patient and read on!


Remember this?

__________________________________________


Now, houses with A Nice Bit Of Stone-Cladding! ©™ are special. Very special. But some are more special than others, and this one is VERY special indeed. We can just imagine the argument that led to it...



So yes... stone-cladding AND wood-cladding on the one house. Actually, we're not sure that's really what it is - it looks more like a bizarre mix of crazy-paving and painted floorboards. (And just what is going on with that garden wall?)

As Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder never sang:

"Wood-cladding and stone-cladding,
live together in perfect harmony
Side by side on the front of some house,
Oh lord, why don't we?"

Well, Stevie, maybe you'd have an excuse, but surely Paul, surely the man that wrote 'Eleanor Rigby', 'Hey Jude' AND 'Rupert And The Frog Song', could find the words to describe it you? In the meantime, to answer the question "why don't we?", well...




...THAT's why not!

__________________________________________


Did that jog your memory? Good!


We could hardly believe this when we saw it - it's the same wacky scheme all over again, but presented in a slightly different but no less half-arsed fashion.


Yes, it's all there; wood-clad upper half, this time ivory rather than ebony.


There's the crazy-paved lower half, this time roughly-hewn, multi-hued and probably installed by someone called Hugh. It looks like what a Hugh might do.


We'll get to the wacky outer wall in a wee while. First though, we'd like to ponder on the age-old question - which came first, wood-cladding or stone-cladding?


Looking at this from another angle makes it more obvious there's something else going on.


There's a cladding-war going on!


The wood-cladding seems to have annexed a significant part of the lower-half territory between the upper-half and the window in a straight-forward land-grab, giving it direct access to the door area.


However, the stone-cladding appears to now be retaliating with it's own flanking maneouvre, an incursion into the upper half around the porch and window roof. A cunning tactic, often successful.


Obviously, only one can win. It'll be a slow war, but we'll keep you informed.


And now, a few words from a special guest.




vote for or bookmark this article:


Bookmark this post:
Google Ma.gnolia DiggIt! Del.icio.us Blinklist Yahoo Furl Technorati Simpy Spurl Reddit StumbleUpon
Vote for this post: Top Blogs Vote on millionrss.com




home

email